The 10 Best Ways to Build Resilience and Stick with your Health Goals

One morning I was writing in my daily gratitude journal and a thought hit me. Each week the same 7 questions reappear. That day I had to write about a sound or sensation I was grateful for. That day also just so happened to be Day One of my new intermittent fasting practice. I was about to hit Hour 16 of my fast and was right about to break my first fast. In that moment, I was grateful for something kind of odd. No, not for the food that was about to come my way, though I was grateful for that too of course. I was grateful to hear my stomach growling. It meant that it was time to eat and that my bodily signals were functioning just as they should.
           
But how often do we actually wait for our stomachs to growl to determine the need to eat? If you’re like me, “just in case” snacking is a real thing. It used to be a regular practice for me. I’d think to myself, “I better eat something now, just in case I get hungry”. Heaven forbid my stomach growls!
 
But why is our stomach growling such a bad thing? Surely, it’s those snack marketers that brainwashed us into thinking that it is never okay to be hungry. But isn’t stomach growling just the sign we need to determine when we are actually hungry enough to eat? Is this sign from our bodies really that much less tolerable than any other daily discomforts that plague us? And also, how often are we really “starving” when we say we are? These were all questions I asked myself as I pondered why it is so hard for us to get through even mild discomfort sometimes in order to meet a goal. 
           
Unfortunately, as with any endeavor, a bit of discomfort is necessary when we are striving to meet our goals. This is when the “so what?” principle really comes in handy for me. When I am trying to push through something but am met with some discomfort, I ask myself, “but so what”?
 
 Quick disclaimer
 You should always listen to your body and heed warning signs. There is a huge difference between mild discomfort and real warning flags. Mild discomfort is manageable though rather annoying whereas dangerous discomfort is unbearable and highly uncomfortable. Being tired and feeling fatigued/burned out are different. Muscle soreness and pain are two different things. Hunger and lightheadedness are also different. Feeling warm and experiencing early heat stroke signs are different. You must first be familiar with your body and its limits in order to proceed with the “So what?” approach.
 
Mind over matter   
So then where can you use the “so what” approach? When your mind is what is stopping you from pushing through. NOT when your body is. Here’s an example:
 
Self: “Ohhh, I don’t want to finish my walk today. It’s humid out and I’m sweating, and I feel so hot and gross”. Now ask yourself, “so what”? Will the sweating kill you? Will feeling gross kill you? Will being hot kill you? If you can safely answer “No” to all of these questions, then just keep going.
 
Self: “Ohhh, but my legs are tired, and it would feel so nice to recline with a nice cold beverage instead”.  Now you respond with: “So what”? Your legs are tired, but you want to tone them, right? You want to get stronger, right? So, keep going. You can recline after. You can enjoy a nice beverage after. You can take a cool shower after.
 
See where I’m going with this? If you want something badly enough, then you must understand the power of delaying gratification and pushing through during these moments. These are the people who meet their goals.    
 
10 things I do to build resilience when the going gets tough

1.) I remind myself why I am doing what I am doing: Why do I want to be more fit? Why do I want to be stronger? Why do I want to lose weight? Why is it important that I stay active? I find that my motivation returns when I check in with myself once in a while and ask myself these questions again. Once I’m reminded, I have newfound energy and the focus needed to get back on track.
 
2.) I imagine my future self: what I will look like and feel like: This one is a fun one for me. I’ve used vision boards in the past for inspiration but usually I just take a moment to envision what I will feel like once I’ve accomplished a particular goal. I picture how others might see me and how I would think of myself. Often times I feel a sense of pride, and sometimes this is all it takes to keep pushing through.

3.) I reflect on past goals that I’ve achieved: There is this thing called self-efficacy. Essentially it means believing in yourself based on previous evidence of goal achievement. This is when tracking progress comes in handy. You can look back and see how far you’ve already come. But you can also ask yourself “what have I been able to accomplish in the past when I’ve set my mind to something”? “. What are examples of times that I’ve pushed through something difficult because I wanted something so badly”? Use these examples to remind yourself that you GOT this!
 
4.) I reevaluate my environment: Are there things around you that are making goal achievement difficult? Are there ways that you can make this activity easier to initiate? Are there any barriers that you can remove? Sometimes it just takes simple changes in your environment to make a change that much easier to stick with.
 
5.) I ask myself whether my goals are realistic: Maybe it’s not that you are failing but you just set goals that were a bit too lofty to start with. Try breaking your goals into smaller, more manageable pieces so you can begin to feel a sense of accomplishment. Rather than saying you are going to lose 50 pounds, say that you are going to lose 1 pound per week. This way, you can see progress as you go. You can check in on yourself often to ensure you’re on track. As a bonus, you can even gain some confidence in your abilities to meet your goals as you proceed.
 
6.) I am not so hard on myself: Don’t strive for perfection. If you do, you will fail every time. Be kind to yourself. Sometimes you will fall off track. All or nothing thinking is a certain path towards throwing in the towel. Accept that there will be good days and not so good days. The bad days are an opportunity to learn from. The good days will sustain you. Be proud of yourself for just showing up on the tough days. That counts for something too.

 7.) I learn from the hard days: I try to foresee obstacles and challenges before they occur so I can have a plan. Usually, it’s the rough days that teach me the most about how to handle them again when they undoubtedly reoccur.
 
8.) I assess my mood: Mood journaling is an effective way to learn more about the impact a healthy activity has on you. Reflecting with a journal can help remind you of why you should push through on days you just aren’t feeling it. When I remember how good my last 3-mile walk made me feel afterwards, that is usually enough to get me out the door on my lazier days.
 
9.) I reward myself: My grandmother used to intentionally wear shoes that were too tight. While no one is recommending doing this, the reasoning behind why she did so was interesting. She looked forward to the relief that she would feel at the end of the day once she took her shoes off. I apply the same thinking to a tough workout. The relief of being finished is a reward in and of itself. I look forward to this feeling after a workout and sometimes that’s all I need. Other times I need a more tangible reward like a delicious espresso waiting for me. Discover what works for you.
 
10.) I have a support system: Accountability partners, workout buddies, encouraging friends, supportive family, online groups…whatever your support system looks like, make sure you can turn to them when you need that extra encouragement. It is never a sign of weakness to seek external support. Sometimes we need that extra strength to persevere.
 
And finally...I have learned to accept discomfort
When your mind doesn’t want to do something, it will find any excuse not to do it. If this is you, then it might be time to check in with yourself and ask yourself how badly you really want to achieve your goal. Expect that somewhere along your journey towards better health, there will be moments of discomfort. And this is okay. While the pursuit should not be miserable, accept that nothing worth having comes without those pesky yet necessary hurdles.

Whether you choose to overcome them or succumb to them will be up to only you. Try to find something you enjoy doing and make it as pleasurable and as easy as possible to do. And then have a plan for when the going gets tough. If you can do this, then you WILL be successful. 
 
But isn’t movement and eating healthy so natural? Isn’t something that comes natural to us, supposed to be easy? Just because our ancestors lived a certain way or because our bodies perform best under certain conditions, does not mean it is necessarily easy or always comfortable.

Our ancestors and our primordial bodies evolved under less-than-optimal conditions. So, in order to achieve optimal health, sometimes our conditions also have to be less than optimal. Adversity builds resilience and persevering through adversity builds strength. It’s as simple as that.

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